Noise And the Blank Canvas
It has been said 10% of life is what actually happens to you and 90% is your reaction to what happens to you. That being said, its our thoughts that comprise our lives. When you strip away all the things we add to life, what we are left with is pretty simple. Unfortunately when you are dealing with mental illness you have a hard time resolving this fact of life.
When you have a mental illness it is difficult to find out exactly are your thoughts and the life beneath those thoughts. Essentially life is a blank canvas. Ultimately everyone chooses the paints and the composition they create with their thoughts. If our attitude is positive or negative, whether our outlook on life is good or bad, these approaches or thought bundles color and layer the canvas. Our actions then build our life and composition into a three dimensional life portrait.
Mental illness has a way of scrambling this picture. Mental illness jumbles your thought processes, and has away of burying emotions to where colors are muddied, buried, or cloaked. And the process of unpacking these thoughts and emotions is not an easy task. And its these pile of colors, this noise that makes mental illness very difficult to analyze on your own. Furthermore, in times of crisis finding anyone else that can make sense of this very abstract painting is a very tenuous process.
But simplicity, and a clear sound can be detected amidst the confusion. Understanding your life picture can take the forms of many treatments. Doctors. therapists, attending small groups, are all ways that when you become honest with yourself, and start communicating your thoughts and feelings with others it is possible to begin to me more intentional about how you are painting your canvas.
Just the act of speaking to others is a huge step. I know for me I also had to learn to write out my thoughts and feelings, and I had to become more open with myself. When you can begin to unpack all this, a simpler picture can begin to emerge. You can begin to see how you are reacting to life, and then eventually you can see the power you have to choose a new thought, a new way of painting your picture intentionally and with purpose.
This process of opening up to treatment is a critical step to living achieving healthier, more aware life. When you can take ownership of your emotions and your thought life, it empowers you to live with more focus and more direction. The picture you paint can be beautiful, its a process that can transform your life and the world around you.
