Driving With Balding Tires
I can think of no better metaphor to describe what living with bi-polar disorder is like. This illustration is by no means a perfect one but it does shed light on the factors that effect you along life's journey.
The car is essentially you, the fuel is what ever you are feeding yourself with be it, what you are reading, what you are listening to, what is coming in from the outside. The engine or what moves the car, it is your expectations. In this case expectations can be positive or negative, and they in some cases for this illustration be seasonal fluctuations. The tires represent your ability to stop the car and to intentionally steer your direction.
Balding tires are an illustration of fear and the effects of fear. When fear is present, even when mood is good, expectations are high, or in the extreme case when mania is present, balding tires represent your inability to harness and stop or steer the car especially from high speeds. Fear will always be on the other side of mania crippling your ability to reach a desired end. Fear overcomes your expectation--it can lead to an awkward end before you get to your destination.
On the opposite side when expectations are negative, fear can leave you spinning your tires, and leave you paralyzed in a rut. With no traction on poorer surfaces fear ends up with you skidding out of control.
For me the effects of fear have been more prevalent in the winter months. In that season, for whatever reason I tend to have my engine running more, my expectations have me running faster, and fear has in the past always stopped me short of my targets.
The effects of balding tires in the warmer months are not as extreme but they still can be harmful. When fear is present you have a hard time gaining momentum, especially from a dead stop. Balding tires/fear can still prevent you from precisely stopping or changing course even in the idealist of conditions.
The simple solution to the fear issue is simply to change the tires. But how do you do that? And what does that practically look like? In truth you need to ask yourself where is this fear coming from, what is it based on. Sometimes our perspective no matter the season is not a clear one. Our perceptions, if we get in the habit of checking them can reveal the sources of the tire damage before we end up skidding again.
Expectations are a beautiful thing, they are what keeps us going. They provide a pathway to what we desire and look forward to. Choosing to believe that the pathway we our on is one of growth, and of expectation we can begin to sort though or thought processes and check our tires and change them before they become hazardous to our journey.
I hope this metaphor has been a helpful tool for you. This blog's material will eventually be condensed to a book, to be published at a later date. Thank you again for reading!
